As a wife and stay at home mom of two children, I wear many hats. On a daily basis my responsibilities can consist of multitasking the roles of a chef, teacher, blogger, housekeeper, accountant, and so much more but lately I have been feeling empty! This emptiness has caused me to desperately want to retreat from all my obligations in the hopes that I can feel refreshed or even at the very least, able to continue my acts of service. As much as I enjoy serving in my many roles, there are times where I start to become overwhelmed by the sheer weight of it all. It has never been an easy thing to admit when I am in need of help or let alone feeling like I am drowning. So while spending time with God, I decided to address this matter but found myself unable to say anything. I started to think that speaking up would be too much like admitting defeat or sound like I was complaining. Now the Bible says in Psalms 55:22 KJV "Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee: he shall never suffer the righteous to be moved." Knowing this verse, you would think that I would have been motivated to lay all my cares down at God's feet rather than continue to still hold on to them.
It was not until one day when I realized I could not carry on this way any longer that I finally decided to address what was on my mind. In my prayer time with God, I heard him say journal all my thoughts down about how I was feeling. So I vented about everything, and I began to notice the spirit of heaviness, that was sitting on my chest, began to remove itself from me slowly. Once I completed the process, I decided that I was ready to go back to covering all my different roles. I quickly found out this was a big mistake! All I ended up doing was allowing myself to get swamped all over again. So here I was, yet again, dealing with the same issue that I thought no longer held me captive. I was in disbelief! How could this even be happening? I began thinking maybe I did not hear the instructions that God had given me correctly. Not knowing what to do, I just decided to fix myself by ignoring the problem altogether. I began to bury my feelings into social media, the television, texting, etc. Anything to avoid dealing with the heart of the matter. As the spirit of heaviness began to return to me, I knew that I needed to ask God why this was happening.
As I returned to my prayer time with God, I questioned: "why am I feeling this way all over again?" What did I do wrong the first time? Sitting patiently I awaited his answer, and the Holy Spirit led me to look up all the times in the Bible when Jesus preached. He wanted me to pay close attention to what Jesus did after being around crowds of people. So as I began to research this topic, I started to observe a pattern which I saw in many different verses in the Bible. The one I want to share with you is in Luke 5:15-16 KJV which says "But so much the more went there a fame abroad of him: and great multitudes came together to hear, and to be healed by him of their infirmities. And he withdrew himself into the wilderness, and prayed." See, what God wants us to comprehend is that we need to make time to get away and communicate with him. By doing this action daily, we can feel recharged even with all our acts of service we are responsible for performing. So if we want to continue to have a servant's heart; we need to stop denying ourselves the time to receive encouragement and a peace of mind that only God can provide.
Consequently, as I began to implement spending time alone while praying into my daily routine, I immediately started to notice a difference in my mood. The Holy Spirit showed me that just as eating food is fuel for our body, spending time with God becomes energy for our soul! It can be easy to get fatigued and feel defeated, especially when we give our time to others, rather it is at work, with our families or at church, etc. To replenish the energy that we send out, we must be willing to follow Jesus' lead by taking time, even if we don't have much, to sit and talk with God. So let me leave you with these words of encouragement for all who are feeling overworked, "Therefore, my beloved brethren, be ye steadfast, unmovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, forasmuch as ye know that your labour is not in vain in the Lord." (1 Corinthians 15:58 KJV)